Funny Lines From Boot Camp

I found a bunch of funny lines in letters recruits sent home from boot camp. Some are from my son, but I won’t tell you which ones. Don’t want anyone getting in trouble!


“I guess not everybody appreciates ninjas.”

“If this is normal, I’m starting to think I made a big mistake.”

“The food is surprisingly good, but we don’t have time to eat it.”

“If you pee in the pool you have to do PT.” [physical training, ie, a gazillion push-ups]

“Mail call is like the ice-cream truck just arrived at the park on a very hot day.”

“I kinda wish I’d stayed at home.”

“I am trying to be a good little recruit but I still screw up.”

“Who loves me more…RDC or Mom?????” [Recruit Division Commanders, like drill sergeants]

My son had a friend from high school that got to Boot Camp a week before him and he had been looking for him. He wrote, “I’ll never find Travis — we all look alike!”

“Mom, I’m pretty sure the way the RDCs talk to us is illegal.”

” I’m gonna kick my recruiters @$$!! ”

My daughter wrote – “I need to break up with my boyfriend (back home). I have grown so much here. I am not the same as I was 8 weeks ago. Oh, and Navy guys are frickin HOT!”

Our son wrote to his sister that he and some of the guys made a top 10 list of why jail would be better than boot camp.

“I got issued BCG — birth control glasses. They’re so ugly no girl would look at you with them on.”

My son was telling me he was getting ready to go to church and I asked which one he went to. He replied, “the one with the free donuts.”

“So yeah, on Monday I got eight letters from you, a little ridiculous — half the mail was for me.”

“One good thing Mom, I’m not crying as much at night.”

“Some of the stuff is really boring. I screw up on purpose just so I get to do pushups.”

My son is going to kill me if he reads this… but in his first letter he wrote this :
1. Mom I’m constipated. I can’t go to the bathroom in front of 80 other guys!
2. My farts are so bad I’m preparing the compartment for the gas chamber exercise
3. Mom, I woke up with a Scooby Doo sticker stuck to my forehead
4. Please quit sending the Scooby Doo stickers.
5. Mom they lost my laundry! I have no tshirts and no underwear!
6. Mom, I’m trying to fly under the radar, are the Sponge Bob stickers necessary?
7. Mom, Knock off the stickers
8. Ok Mom who’s idea was it anyway to send me a card 3 feet long?
9. Mom you won’t believe where I found a sticker today. Yes, ladies… you guessed it … skivvies.
10. Mom these are the people you warned me about! [RDC’s]

“Week one in the showers everybody is so shy, but by the end, everyone is dancing around singing. I can’t wait to take a bath BY MYSELF.”

“All the guys look up or straight ahead. When someone says, ‘I’ve dropped my soap’-that’s your cue to NOT LOOK DOWN!!”

“This is nothing! Band camp was harder then boot camp!”

When my son came home after boot camp we were getting ready to go surprise his grandparents at church and I made the mistake of trying to iron his uniform. He said, “Mom, didn’t anyone ever teach you how to iron properly?”

He also asked if our hotel room had an iron so he could iron is white undershirt. When I told him we didn’t have one, you should have seen the look of concern on his face. I RAN to the hotel front desk to get the iron for him.

“Please don’t send musical cards. We have to do push ups to the song.”

“I wish I could hold you in my arms right now. Well actually not RIGHT now cause there are like 80 other guys sharing the same room with me but you know what I mean.”

“Mom I miss you so much can you send me a picture of my dog??”

“Today we got to have a pizza party! The RDC ate pizza and we did pushups until he was done eating.”

“Mom, you wouldn’t believe this but I volunteer to take out the trash just so I can go outside!!”

“Getting gassed is not as much fun as you’d think.”

Which was your favorite? Here are some more ….

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