I got these funny observations about life (lifeservations?) from a friend. It’s one of those viral emails that makes its way around the world in about eight seconds. Even if you’ve seen it, though, it’s worth another giggle.
I wish I knew who writes these things — some of them are hilarious. Like this one. It was long, though, so you get one every day this week —Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday AND Friday. [I know you know the days of the week. That’s to remind me to link them all.]
23. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
24. Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using ‘as in’ examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss’s last name to an attorney and said “Yes that’s G as in …(10 second lapse) …umm … Goonies.”
25. What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?
26. While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it…thanks Mario Kart.
27. MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
28. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
29. I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.
30. I would like to officially coin the phrase ‘catching the swine flu’ to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an ugly woman. Example: “Dave caught the swine flu last night.”
31. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.
32. Bad decisions make good stories
33. Whenever I’m Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don’t mind if I do!
Got a favorite?