Tag Archives: BeckyLand

Blog Spam … It’s Not Just For Sandwiches

I’ve written before about the funny ways people stumble into BeckyLand. Most of them seem to want to be here. But there’s an odd phenomenon at play in The Land where people try to take advantage of me. I used to call these people “my family” but I’ve come to realize they are, in fact, spammers.

I know they’re not my family because they speak softly and flatter me, trying to get me to buy their porn or Canadian pharmaceuticals via my ego. It’s normally a good strategy, but they, unlike my family, don’t know how very lazy I am. It’s like a religion with me. “Click there? I don’t think so. I am fatigued from typing winking emoticons on facebook status updates.”

Here are some examples of the spam I get in BeckyLand. Not all of it employs the let’s-dazzle-her-with-flattery scheme. But it’s all worthy of attention. At least momentarily.

• “I found lots of interesting information on beckyland.wordpress.com. The post was professionally written and I feel like the author has extensive knowledge in the subject. beckyland.wordpress.com keep it that way.” Oh, wait. How’d this get in here? This can’t be spam. It’s perfectly reasoned and articulate. Clearly from a highly intelligent being.

• “Hi, interesting post. I have been thinking about this issue, so thanks for writing. I will certainly be subscribing to your posts.” Really? They’ve been thinking about awesome places to piddle around the world? Really? In their defense, it was an extremely entertaining blog and of course they’ll be thinking about it forever, but really … before I posted it?

• “eh… luv it ))” I’m sorry, but this seems kinda lukewarm to me.

• “[…] Read the original: How People Stumble into BeckyLand […]” Let’s see… how do I explain this? Oh, yeah. This WAS posted on the original, ya freak! Trying to trick me into reading my own blog?? I won’t fall for that again.

• “Hi everybody. I’ve been lurking around the forum for a while but I have a question to ask. I’m trying to find a legit seller for r4 cards for my nintendo. I’m in Germany and I found one site that looks promising.” Nice try, Hans, but you can’t fool me. How can you be in Germany but writing in English? Everyone knows that’s not possible. Plus, I never mailed my blog to Germany.

• “1mDeK3 trowreddizfq, [url=https://gqsulqsinvxk.com/]gqsulqsinvxk[/url], [link=https://doxafvttoxae.com/]doxafvttoxae[/link], https://jircjscttyxv.com/” Sorry. This one is from my family. Dad, how many times do I have to tell you? Left pinky goes on the “A.”

• “seattle festival scared ipl semi garden parkway night the 2 their identity…people who blithely trusted those who traded in human beings. battle against the machines. bull birmingham sands night the 2 havlat phobaeticus the crowd, the League. insect life, flora and fauna fighting for survival in the sheltered, fertile way orlando players nj 49th beef may boston taste cincinnati charles martin states ovguide planetary dictators, gathering desperate volunteers from the broken population face on the screen, sifted through the mountain of suffocating memories shown that the retrovirus broke down quickly after the initial epidemic, andthe streets, you have come right to me, like a gift. leukemia mark video dance movie elijah dwight imposing citadel Thurr” One question. What are you selling? Because I’m pretty sure I want to buy it.

Do you get funny spam?

Weird Search Terms

In the last few days, people used these terms to wander into BeckyLand. Some of them make perfect sense, but others?

• ala challenged books the book cut by pat
• church lady cake recipe?
• “my glasses” squint
• goofy horse humor videos
• pom on of mice and men (at least 100 kin
• huckleberry finn – synesthesia
• guess the carols
• “10,000 hour rule” +”writing a novel”
• im just sayin becky
• hbook.com/blog
• jesus obama
• allan pinkerton early life you are a fat penguin you stupid fatty you
• goofy texas marching band pants
• acts retreat in omaha, nebraska
• i hate synthesia
• why the book “i know why the caged bird
• tuba christmas

This cyber world fascinates and disturbs me. And probably others. Like the person looking for “goofy horse humor videos” who only found a video of me.  Hey! Wait a minute!

Goofy texas marching band pants” fascinated me. So I googled it. My blog came up as the fifth link, but how can you not investigate these other gems?

• The most effective way to strangle a band geek while still keeping their pants up. …
• If I ran for President, my platform would be… a marching band truck. … that one day the giant storm rolled in and I think I peed my pants a little …

This has got to be my favorite search term, though: “allan pinkerton early life you are a fat penguin you stupid fatty you.”

They totally win points for searching unique information, but I gotta admit, my feelings were a little hurt. Since my name isn’t Allan Pinkerton, that only leaves the fat penguin part. And I’m not a penguin.

What exactly do you think “pom on of mice and men (at least 100 kin” means? Besides the obvious ”” some high school student looking for homework shortcuts ”” of course.

Pomegranates in Of Mice and Men? At least 100 kinds? I don’t really remember a big tropical fruit scene from the book. Admittedly, I haven’t read it in awhile. And are there really 100 kinds of pomegranates?

Poem? At least 100 in King Lear? Did they get sidetracked in their research? Or were they trying to write one paper for two classes? I heartily recommend this approach to homework, by the way. I once wrote a paper entitled “Thar Juliet Blows!” combining my extensive knowledge of both Shakespeare and Herman Melville.

I guess I’ll never know what they were looking for … unless one of you ”˜fesses up!

What do you think they were trying to find?