I’ve never been a big fan of Halloween. Seemed like a lot of effort just to get some candy. And I know beggers shouldn’t be choosy, but seriously? Necklaces you chew on? I was no neatnik, but eww, a kid’s collar was never the same.
And not to go all Jerry Seinfeld on you, but what’s the deal with candy corn? It’s clearly neither. It’s the phrase for which quotation marks were made for.
Don’t get me started on costumes either. I trick-or-treated in the wilds of suburban Colorado Springs, at the base of Pikes Peak. Every fairy, superhero, princess, witch, and robot were bundled up in layers and layers of coats and hats. We all looked like hoboes, the best costume EVER.
I clamped a bubblegum cigar between my teeth and terrorized the smiling, apron-clad mothers with my surly blackmail threat.
“Trick,” — at this I cocked an eyebrow and paused dramatically — “or treat.” Luckily, there were some easily intimidated moms in my neighborhood and I never had to resort to anything more ferocious than opening my pillowcase wider. Perhaps a dramatic shake if they didn’t move fast enough.
I tell you this so you will understand the motivation behind the new -t-shirts I made for my Lazy Squirrel Designs store.
Just so you know, all the shirts come in a huge variety of styles, prices and colors, and most can be customized. You get to play around until you’ve found the perfect one.
Of course, if you’re too lazy to put on a shirt, there’s also this …